Blame Will Never Make a Relationship Better... Even With Your Horse - Your Riding Success

Thursday 28/06/2012

I was doing some preparation for my relationship workshop, which I am holding later in the year, and I came across in my notes the phrase – “…blame will never make a relationship better.”

How true is that! And not just in intimate relationships, but in any relationships, with anyone… including your horse. 

How quick are we to judge and blame our horse for not being all he can be… whereas I often ask… are WE being all we can be?

We want our horses to be fit, supple, energised and willing. But are we being all of that?

I had to laugh in pole dancing last week – I have a trick which is a handstand up wrap your legs around the pole and fold up, using your abs so you are then sitting on the pole. Hard enough trick the way it is, but now I have to improve the handstand… I thought it was awesome to just do a handstand!!!! But now I have to have dead straight legs, I have to come up slowly in an arc and I can’t bend my legs at all until they are on the pole… what the!?!?!? 🙂

I suddenly realised how Abe felt! When I taught him ones, he didn’t get it! Kind of like me, I couldn’t even get the handstand! Now I get the handstand, same as Abe gets the ones, but now they have to be better! Ahhhhh!!!!! So glad I’m not a horse as I would have bucked my rider off months ago!!!!

It takes an emotional maturity to accept what your horse offers even though you wish it was better. I am filled with love and admiration for my horse and his ability to do all the Grand Prix movements! If he makes a mistake – it is either me not preparing him well enough, not saving him, or just… he can’t do it well enough yet. Same as me with my handstand, it will take time and skill to develop – and even then in the routine, one little bit off, and my leg bends. 

So I trust this is a reminder that blame is never the answer, and if the horse isn’t performing as you want, first make sure you are the rider you need to be, and then systematically train your horse so he becomes more capable to do the tasks you want from him! Remember it isn’t up to him to do it, it’s up to you to help him do it.

To Your Success,

Natasha Althoff Signature

Natasha

p.s –  If you dream of having the perfect body to ride your horse, but you are unsure how to get it… then check out Natasha’s new Your Riding Success Health & Body Workshop by clicking here!

p.p.s –   To learn the tools Natasha uses train her horse so that he is strong enough to do what she wants, click here if you are a Your Riding Success member!

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